It's been over a month now with Teen living with us. What have I learned? Well, a 17 year old foster child is not the same as a 17 year old biological child. At 17 I wasn't much trouble. I obeyed the rules, had some freedom, held down a part-time job, did well in school. Just basically did what was expected of me. 17 year old foster kids may still have issues. I don't know about all of them, just the one I have. Her emotional age is more along the lines of a 12 year old. She is not secure, struggles with self-esteem and not a lot of impulse control. It's more like the preteen years than the teenage years. It worries me because she will be technically considered an adult soon (at 18 can sign herself out of foster care) and I don't think she is anywhere near ready. Where do we start with all she needs to learn? And of course, kids at this age think they know everything. I wasn't ready to be on my own at 18. I think very few kids are. Their brain does not fully develop until 25.
I am not saying for anyone not to take in a foster child this old. I think there is a big need for people to do this. Just be prepared that it may not be what you think. It is a lot more babysitting than I thought it would be. And it is hard for people to understand. I am exhausted. Teen wants constant attention, which she needs. And of course Abbie wants attention too. She is not willing to give up any attention for someone else. So all day long it's "mommy! Mommy!!".
Has anyone else wanted to change their name for just one day?
Btw, I love my girls
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